tributed | [ rl with Nero ]

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[ rl with Nero ]

[These past couple of months had been a living hell for Katniss. Restrictions on District Twelve were higher than ever, and the announcement of the Third Quarter Quell sealed her death. Going back into the arena meant death for her so Peeta could live. Peeta had to go home. that was the arrangement she'd reached with Haymitch. It's what they both owed Peeta.

But Katniss just wanted to forget. About training with Peeta and Haymitch and struggling to help Gale and his family survive. She just wanted company as she hid out in the forest where she'd told Nero to meet her when she left the voice message for him to come to District Twelve to see her.]

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I didn't. [ It wasn't like he was mad. It was hard to be mad when it wasn't her fault. If this place wasn't so fucked up, so backward, maybe she'd have a real chance -- without someone changing something for her. All he could do was search around, pin point where this hellhole started, and one by one quickly-- ]

What about your sister? Prim? What will she do then? Screw those idiots. People hurt here because this life isn't fair.

She'll be better without me. As long as I'm alive everyone I love has a target on their back. When I'm gone there won't be a reason to target her anymore.

[Don't make this so hard, Nero! she's made her decision, made herself distance herself from everyone she cares about to make saying goodbye easier. Don't make her have to rethink it all.]

I don't get it. Wasn't it you who took Prim's place in the first place? I don't get why you think they won't just come back and pick her. Maybe I don't understand much, but it doesn't sound like it'll ever end. If you leave now or die... what's the different?

[ It pissed him off to feel this way, and pissed him off he couldn't change it. He wanted to shake her, and immediately drag her off. ]

I'm in a corner, Nero! [Her voice raising now.] They're watching my every move. If I stay people die, if I leave people die. I didn't want this! I just wanted Prim to live. That's why I went into these damn games.

And now there's a damn revolution and more games and more death and I can't stop it!

And what makes you think you can stop that? [ His voice was clam, something he wasn't usually too good at. But two fire crackers -- well it's not like there was much to lose, but still; he felt her pain. ]

Death is going to come to others with or without you, Katniss. It's a fact, anywhere you go. That's the life these people made. They don't need to suffer but neither do you. Who can make you see that?! You think their life will be any better without you?!

[ Nero sighed, and looked away. ] I know you didn't ask me here to argue with you.

[Deep breaths Katniss. She could calm down again. She could be fine.]

Maybe it will continue without me. But at least without me it won't be because of me.

Maybe I just don't get it. Maybe I don't want to get it. It's sick, I'm so damn tired of people getting used. Good people.. You're going to stay here? [He looked at her, hoping if he looked hard enough, he'd get a difference answer. ]

[Except she's doing her hardest not to look back at him.] I have to, Nero. I just... can't leave.

So, in the meantime, I'm here for... moral support? Gotta tell you... I still want to kick their asses, though.

Me too. [She sighs.] I'm practicing this restrain thing. It's barely working.

Hey, you too? [ Barely working, indeed. His right arm was burning, the rage definitely not helping. Not a good time to show someone who you Are. ]

.... Sorry for getting .. so damn angry. I know it isn't your fault. I just-- You're too strong to give up and, they're making you. It pisses me off.

Thanks, Nero. [Finally calmed down herself. Except she wasn't about to burst into something else here. She barely noticed that Nero was struggling with something. She thought he was just pissed off. Like he had every right to be.]

I just... you learn to live with it.

It's hard to think of anything else when that's all you're given but... [ Calm. It was something he'd have to have if he wanted to control himself. It was hard when he was so used to being able to unleash everything he was inside. Then again, usually things needed a touch of Hell's Chaos. Not that this didn't, he thought at least.

The uncomfortable heat would have to wait. He sighed and exhaled heavily.]

Learning to live with it... don't you believe that you have anything better waiting for you? You have to know that you don't deserve this.

This world isn't like the others. There is nothing better. People are born in this hell and they die in it.

[It was a fact of life in her world. And every now and then someone like Prim and Peeta was born. They were worth dying for in her opinion.]

If I can't convince you to leave, will you let me pound them into the ground? [ He was half kidding. It would be easy. One, two, how many? He couldn't tell her that even the joking thought of taking them out was enough to calm the pain. ]

If I could, I would. I'd hit them too. [There was a small, hint of a smile. A sign she was relaxing a bit. Even if she was trying not to focus on how her hands were tied behind her back in all this. She just had to follow everyone else's orders.]

That doesn't answer if I could. [ For a long second he waited, thinking about what she would think. 'Monster' , probably.

Regardless of what he wanted to do, he sat down, unsure quite what to do, except sneak glances at the girl in front of him. ]

[As he sat down on the ground she sat down across from him. She kind of wished he'd come sit next to her. Or she had the guts to sit next to him.]

Not without getting me in trouble.

No one knows me, right? [ and engulfed in a soul that wasn't completely his, he wondered more and more. For now, he'd notice her distance. Someone told him one (or twice... or more.) to take a little chance. He sighed and shook his head, wondering what he could get away with- just with innocent words.

He wasn't exactly good with them. His mind flipped flopped. Move closer. Stay put. Just friends, don't be an idiot. Don't be weird. Weirdo.]

I'm glad I came.

[ She wanted to say no. That no one knew who he was. But she thought these woods were safe, but this is where Gale had kissed her, and the President had known about that.

But her mind didn't have to stay on the for very long. Not when Nero was speaking again, making her look up to catch the edge of his words. It left her a little confused before she realized what he said. And for another moment could barely comprehend him saying that to her. ]

I'm glad you did too. [ The words felt foreign on her tongue but came forth so easily. And she knew that with them came a threat on Nero's own life now. Thank god he lived in another world. ]

I tried not to think about you too much. It made things weird. I don't get it... but I thought... [ he didn't have answers, just feelings - and those didn't feel too reliable. ]

I don't know what I thought. [ A shift in place brought him just a bit closer. He'd rather have a pounding chest than hot anger. He looked her over a little more, curious. He hadn't really seen her in person that often, not in complete mental clarity.

That last virus seemed like a dream. There were a lot of unanswered questions, and feelings. ]

[ As he moved closer to her she wanted to scoot away to give him more room to sit next to her, but she was afraid if she did he'd think she didn't want him close. And in all honesty... she didn't mind his company. She preferred it. Over Gale's. Over Peeta's... ]

You thought... [ She started, deep breath. Answer. ] Thought seeing each other might help work things out.

[ Because that was what she was thinking right now. She was engaged to Peeta, and Gale was her oldest friend in the world. But above all that were all these feelings wrapped up in thoughts of Nero she hadn't had time to sort through and figure out. But out here, alone with him. Maybe could start. ]

Hah... maybe, maybe that's it. [ It wasn't that simple for him, either. There's was back home, important others that he had been distancing slowly from. It wasn't hard, though.

He stopped thinking for a minute, and just reacted. Moving closer and then stopping again. ]

Do you remember anything .. weird? I mean, with us? I've been thinking about something- but if it's a dream, I don't know.

Weird? You mean besides the virus?

[ She remember the virus. She remembered dating him and being a girl from the Capitol. She remembered Gale kissing her and how she'd rejected him because she was dating Nero and only wanted Nero.

And maybe that wasn't so different from today. Ring on her finger or not. ]

[ She remembered? That made it more awkward - was there another time? Now he wasn't sure, and felt odd and hot again, a mix of frustration and nerves. A proper response, he thought. ]

No.. t-the virus, I mean - it, augh. You remember it? All of it? It isn't like some weird lucid dream to you..? [ I wasn't dreaming. If he ever admitted to being embarrassed, he would have now. He felt it - and tried to hide it, wanting anger again over this raw awkwardness.

He remembered all the feelings for her, and ... no, that he was ignoring. It kept him up late at nights anyway. Too awkward. ]

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